Feeling Adequately Inadequate

Every now and then I will be driving down the road and think of something so ridiculously witty and on point that I cannot wait to get home to write it out. Then I get home and life. Suffice it to say, today was one of those days. I have absolutely no idea what it was that I wanted to share with the world, but imagine it was terribly insightful and hilarious and then thank me for having a profound impact on your life.

Now that we have that out of the way, I feel the need to actually share something with my adoring audience. (Hi, hubby!)

But, I’ve got nothing. Absolutely, nothing. Which strangely sums up my life as of late. There is so much going on all the time, almost too much, yet I have the feeling that I am only spinning my wheels. Maybe this is what it feels like to be a stay-at-home-mom and homeschool teacher. I’m still learning, so I could be wrong. I don’t recall reading any labels about being a SAHM that said Caution: May Invoke Feelings of Inability to Accomplish Anything. Were they there and I was ignoring them?

I cannot be the only one that feels this way, can I? Am I?

The realization is ever present of how blessed I am to be able to stay home with our children, to not only take care of their everyday needs, but to also learn them a thing or two… or everything they need to know to be productive and responsible adults. Wow. I am blessed. But I am also a wreck.

My mind has been scrambled, like the image of the eggs, “This is your brain. This is your brain with 3 kids.” Down is up and up is to the left and I think I forgot to put the load of clothes in the dryer. 3 days ago.

My body is in shambles. Yeah, I don’t really want to go there. Big sigh. You know what 3 kids has brought me? 25 to 30 extra pounds. Thanks, kids. And the ability to carry 100 pounds worth of babies and bags in a single leap. Plus a sore back.

My house. Hm.

My clothes. Stained and bigger than I’d like them to be.

My car. Old, noisy, and filthy.

My entertainment. Cartoons, cartoons, and cartoons. Seriously. Even when they are all asleep and the man is not around, I find myself watching cartoons. The Jungle Book is currently playing. I chose it.

My personal time. Limited.

My life. Wonderful.

My heart. Full.

My worth. Endless.

My family. Priceless.

Growing and educating a family is not about meeting deadlines. This is something I need to be reminded of at times, because before children, I worked in a world where every single project had a deadline. And people counted on me to meet those deadlines. Now I work for little monsters who only understand “right now” and I’ve been commissioned to train and prepare them for Eternity. The thing about that is, I do not know when this deadline will be. So, I’ll spin my wheels. I’ll leave those clothes in the washing machine one more day (don’t judge). I’ll focus on my family’s emotional and spiritual needs and feel as if I’m accomplishing nothing, all the while knowing that every single thing I say and do adds to or takes from their well-being. Even the things I don’t say or do.

I’ll continue to feel inadequate, because how could I possibly be fit to do this kind of job? Yet, it is precisely this kind of job that I was created for, so I am the exact person to do it. Mistakes will happen, forgiveness will be sought, love will increase, wisdom will be obtained, and I still will not be able to remember what I originally wanted to write about.

~Lisa

How To Interact With A Pregnant Lady and Come Away Unharmed

1. Do not ask: Are you pregnant?
                       Just don't. Do not ever ask any woman if she is pregnant. Because if you do, it will go one of two ways. Either, she is pregnant and feeling very self-conscious about her weight gain and you've just validated that she is GETTING HUGE. Or, the other obvious scenario, she is NOT pregnant and you've just told her she looks pregnant. Not nice.
                       So, what are your options if you think someone is pregnant? Only one will suffice, sit it out and wait for either a pregnancy reveal, an undeniable pregnant belly (this occurs literally seconds before the baby is born, do not assume anything until then), or, you know, an actual newborn baby in her arms.

2. Do not have this conversation: Asks... How far along are you? (Hears answer) Replies... Oh.
                       The question is just fine. It shows you are interested in her and her baby's life. The reply is not appropriate. Oh. Oh what? Ohhhh, there is no way you are only X number of weeks along, because you look like you are about to bust? Ohhhh, if that is how big you are half way through your pregnancy, you are going to need a bigger vehicle to get around 15 weeks from now? Ohhhh, you look too small to be almost done with your pregnancy?
                       Okay, this is what you are doing. You are telling her she is going to have a 15 pound baby and will have nightmares about it for the rest of her life. You are calling her fat. You are telling her that her baby is too small and will have all sorts of developmental issues because she isn't eating "enough". You really should just say, "Oh, that's wonderful. You look great."

3. Do not ask: Are you sure you aren't having twins?
                       Come on now. Use some common sense here. Because if you are tempted to ask that to the wrong pregnant lady, you just might regret not listening to me.

4. Do not touch the belly.
                       If you don't have the right to touch her belly when she isn't pregnant, you for sure do not have the right to touch it now that she is pregnant. Personal space, please. I could go on and on about this, and I have multiple times, but I will leave this here.

5. Do not say: You look tired!
                       I'm sure I have been guilty of this, and if I have said this to any of you, I apologize. Honestly, though, no one wants to be told they look tired. Even if they haven't slept in 3 days.

6. Do not say: You think you are tired now, just wait until the baby comes.
                       She is tired now. Let her be. If you cannot fix the situation, then don't make her feel worse. There is a good chance she already knows she will be even more tired once the baby comes.

7. Do not ask: You know what causes that, right?
                       Um, yes. Yes, most people know what causes it. Even if they hadn't planned to get pregnant, they know what caused the pregnancy. They especially know what causes it if they already have, let's say, 7 other children.

8. Do say: You look wonderful.
                       Okay, don't lie. If they don't look wonderful, just say hi.

9. Do ask: How are you feeling?
                       It shows you are concerned about her well-being and is a nice gesture. An even better gesture would be paying for all her children's future college educations, but that may not be possible for you at this time.

10. Do ask: Do you know if the baby is a boy or girl?
                       And express your excitement for whatever their answer is. Even if they plan on waiting to find out when the baby is born, most all women want to talk about the baby's gender.

11. Do: Let the pregnant lady have your seat.
                       If she refuses, then she just may need to stand for a bit. But, boy, I tell ya, people are not as considerate as they used to be. Younger people used to give older people their seats, men used to give women their seats, and those who were capable of standing on their own used to give pregnant ladies their seats. Not any more.

12. Do: Tell her you are praying for her and the baby.
                       And really do pray for them. Pray for their health, their safety, and their future.

13. Do: Help whenever you can.
                       We all need help from time to time. Be ready and willing to give a hand. You'll feel good about helping out and she'll feel your love and concern.

14. Do not: Ask her to remember anything.
                       Seriously, anything. Pregnancy brain is a real thing. If it is important for her to remember, send a text, an email, a Facebook message, a letter, a telegram, a carrier pigeon. Something in written form, preferably with a continual alarm or alert until she no longer needs to store that information in her brain.

15. Do: Love her.
                       She is doing something amazing. She is growing and nurturing a child and will soon introduce him or her to this world. While it is definitely not miraculous and definitely not unique to her, it is still wonderful. And it still takes its toll on her body and her mind.

16. Do: Give her chocolate.
                       Lots of chocolate.

17. If you are her husband, Do: Everything for her.
                       Everything. Let her just stay in bed sleeping and reading all day.

Okay, maybe those last 2 are not so subliminal messages from me to my husband. ;) It was worth a shot.

~Lisa

What's New...

I had no idea, but it has apparently been over 4 months since I last wrote a blog article. I have missed having time to sit down and put my thoughts on "paper". And, honestly, I have a million things I should be doing right now other than writing, yet here I am.

Things have changed so much since my last blog. My sweet husband and I decided at the end of December that it was time for us to move on to a new ministry. We loved those we were working with before and loved the congregation we worked and worshiped with, but we felt a need to get back into full-time ministry as opposed to part-time. For anyone who is a part of a preacher's family will know, job searches can take months and months and sometimes up to a year. So our tentative plan was to move in the summer. God's plan was a much faster move.

It was a bit of a whirlwind move.

We tried out at a congregation on January 12th, were offered the position that night, and started working with them the first week in February. We would be moving 2 1/2 hours away and had less than 3 weeks to find a rent house, pack up our house, and get moved. Somehow we did it. Well, it was with a lot of help from family and friends that we did it.

Many times in my life I have wondered if the choices I had made, or the choices my husband and I had made together, really were in accordance with God's will. Sometimes it truly is difficult to know and so we do the best that we can. And then there are those times where it is very obvious that we most likely made the wrong decision and suffer accordingly. Yeah, don't want to repeat those mistakes. But this, this feels so right. We are loving it here and loving getting to know those around us. While we do miss our family and friends that we left behind, we are very happy with the move and the house and the new work.

So that is the big change we made in the past 4 months. Lots and lots of other things have happened, and I wish I would have made time to write. I'll have to catch you up on our little sweeties and give details of what a failure I am at homeschooling the eldest, but that will wait for another day.

Hope the past 4 months have been full of great things for you as well.

~Lisa

Hey! Your 3 Year Old Just Schooled You.

I am spoiled. A lot of us are. I kind of already knew this, but a recent shopping trip with my three year old daughter really hit it home for me.

We were out shopping with my mom, you see I needed some long sleeve shirts that actually fit thanks to 2 babies and no will-power. I am pretty sure I can make a valid argument for the shirts and for some reason I feel like I need to convince you of that as well, probably because of what my sweet girl said to me while we were shopping.

It started with my browsing of the boot section when we first walked in the store. On the way out I was headed back that way so I could look one more time. Then this happened:

Big Little Girl A: Where are we going?

Me: To look at boots again.

Girl A: Why?

Me: Because I want a new pair of boots.

Girl A: Why do you want a new pair of boots? Mom, you have boots.

Me: I just do.

Girl A: But you have boots, 2 of them. You have 2 boots.

Me: Yeah, I know.

Girl A: And they are good boots. You like your boots.

Me: I know, but I just want a new pair.

Girl A: Why do you want new boots when you have a good boots at home?

Me: Nevermind… I give up.

Schooled by a 3 year old.

I mean, really? She might as well have said "Why are you being so materialistic, mom? You have perfectly good boots at home, that you are lucky enough to actually like, and now you want to spend some more of our family's hard-earned money on more boots. You know, the money that dad works to earn 6 to 7 days a week while you haul us littles around and go shopping for something you don't even need." 

I tell ya, I was feeling pretty sheepish as I turned the corner and walked away from the pretty boots. 

Ever heard that saying "Kids are meant to be seen and not heard"? This is one of those times where I wish it was true, I mean, I am really thankful to be able to hear my little girl's wise words that put me in my place. 

It has also occurred to me that I need a filming crew to follow us around and catch these exchanges on video because I can never really do them justice when I try to retell them.

This is my life and I love it.

~Lisa

Things I Have Learned from the Great Giraffe Game

If you are on Facebook you may have run across the currently trending Great Giraffe Game. To break it down, it is a riddle, if you get the riddle wrong you change your profile picture to a giraffe. Simple.

Well, smart little me saw the riddle and thought "I so got this!" and sent the riddler my answer. I had no intentions of changing my picture because I am too smart to be tricked by some silly riddle. I hit send on my answer and immediately realized I was WRONG. That is hard for me to say, but I got got. So I joined in and changed my picture.

As I was scrolling through my newsfeed last night I was amused by how many people are getting sucked in to this game. At least it is something fun and positive instead of the usual sports and politics that everyone wants to argue about. Well, except, see number 9 below.

If you are one of the few who has not seen the riddle making its rounds, here it is for you:

I got it wrong . . . I agreed to change my profile pic to a giraffe because I got a riddle wrong. Silly riddle! I'm playing along.

          The Great Giraffe Game!...The deal is I give you a riddle.

You get it right you get to keep your profile pic.

You get it wrong and you change your profile pic to a Giraffe for the next 3 days.

MESSAGE ME ONLY SO YOU DON'T GIVE OUT THE ANSWER. Here is the riddle: 3:00 am, the doorbell rings and you wake up. Unexpected visitors, It's your parents and they are there for breakfast. You have strawberry jam, honey, bread, and cheese. What is the first thing you open?

Remember... message me only. If you get it right I'll post your name here. If you get it wrong change your profile pic. GO!

Now I know you are the curious type and just need to know what I have learned from this silly game. So here goes. :)

Ten Things I Have Learned From the Great Giraffe Game

1. A lot, and I mean a whole bunch, of us are not as smart as we like to think we are.
2. Some people will never play along and feel the need to let you know that they will not play along. Spoil sports.

3. There are some creative pictures of giraffes and cute, adorable ones.

4. Hundreds, maybe thousands, of people can seemingly keep a secret.

5. Then there are those who purposely give away the answer. Again, spoil sports.

6. There is always that person who did not read through all the instructions and will immediately put the answer in a comment. That habit probably started in grade school, just saying.

7. Three days does not necessarily mean three entire days. Says the woman who did not wait an entire 72 hours to change my profile picture to something other than the giraffe of shame.

8. When most of your newsfeed is covered in giraffe profile pictures it is easy to get confused. You may actually have to read profile names. I was surprised that someone I didn't know would mention my name in a comment on a friend's status then I realized it was me, I was that particular giraffe.

9. People will even argue over the answer to a riddle. These may be the same people who seem to live to argue with strangers on the internet.

10. Finally, the answer to the riddle is . . .

Have a wonderfully giraffey day!
~Lisa

Weighing Us Down

You know how when you are not doing so well with a task or goal that you do not really want to talk about it? Yeah, so, I'm sure you can imagine why we've been pretty quiet about our weight loss lately. But I do believe we are back on track. (fingers crossed)

Our latest weigh in has mixed reviews. Sweet man is up by about 12 pounds from his start weight back in August and I am down by about 5 pounds. So good and bad. We still struggle with doing well during the week and then going off plan on the weekends. Just have to get a handle on that and I am sure it will help tremendously is getting us to our goals.

Good news! We started Weight Watchers last week. We both like it so far. There is definitely a learning process that goes along with Weight Watchers and we are slowly getting it. I love how it forces us to keep track of what we are eating each day and how there is a place to keep track of our daily physical activity. Even if we go off plan and have a bad day, we still record it and hope to make up for it with extra activity points throughout the week. I'm praying this is the program that will work for us so we can get ourselves healthy!

Oh, the no soda thing, well I haven't been doing so well on that. I have managed to not start drinking it on a regular basis like I was before, but I still drink some ever now and again.

So to recap our weight goals, the man now wants to lose 174 and I have lost 5 of the 25 I want to lose. I read The Little Engine That Could to sweet girl the other day, and, well, all I have to say is "We can do it!". We can and we will.

~Lisa

Naming Our School

I have been thinking for the past couple of hours about what we could name our homeschool. You know, for when we want to incorporate a mascot and for our letterhead. Well, maybe it is really because I didn't feel like teaching today and this was a good way to waste some time. Yep.

Anyway, while searching the web for some inspiration I came across this website that has a school name generator. Try it out, it was fun and entertaining.

Some of my favorite names from that generator:
The Useful Prep School of Weird Children - This one probably describes most schools, public and private, because aren't all children just a bit weird. It gave me a chuckle. Then I saw The Freaky Boarding School of Beautiful Education. I don't have anything to add to that, it is a pretty great name, haha. Another name I enjoyed because it is basically exactly what a homeschool is, that is The Complete Boarding School. But my absolute favorite was The Over-Whelmed School, this encompasses everything about our school right now. I doubt that will ever change.

So other than something simple like School, I cannot think of anything real catchy to name our school. What are your ideas? If you homeschool and named your school, what is your name? 

The more I think about it, I might just name it The Experiment.

~Lisa